Deeply personal thoughts…

Living On Oxygen for Life

All of my life I have had my health problems. I was born with them and they progressively have gotten worse. I know I’m dying and I know that everyone dies eventually. I’m NOT telling you this for your pity or to make you sad for me. Because I was born with so many health problems, I’ve never been able to purchase life insurance. I wish it could be available for everyone for a decent affordable price. I know that my family will always take care of my husband. They would never let him falter if, in deed, I am the one who goes first. Through some miracle and K’s job, an opportunity became available for us to purchase a small life insurance policy for me with no questions asked and no medical exam needed. We could NOT believe our luck and we pounced on it.

My biggest fears was that I would be leaving K in a huge debt with my health ever increasingly getting worse. One of the reasons my in-laws was worried about us getting married was for this reason. I made a promise to myself that I would NEVER let this happen. Medicine is expensive and hospital stays can rack up a big bill even with health insurance. But all that matters is that I have K and he has me. It’s why we celebrate my birthday… my life.. in such a big way. We do everything we can to travel once a year on my birthday. We build memories that pull us through the difficult times and when we get a scare with my health.

Maybe traveling is difficult with my van loaded down with all my medical equipment. I know it’s harder for me to get adjusted to a new climate when we travel. It takes me extra days to build up some energy after traveling to where we are going. I think it’s really worth the effort because every now and then, K and I will sit back and just reminisce about our past vacations and how much fun we had. Especially with our rubber chicken. *wink*

I love life… I love living… and I love being silly. My happiness depends on that. I create my own happiness. No one can do that for me. I decide to be happy even when I feel terrible. Life doesn’t rule me because I’m the captain of this ship.

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3 thoughts on “Deeply personal thoughts…

  1. Isn’t it refreshing to accept your own mortality? I think that people who accept that they will eventually die, if not sooner than most, are happier more content people. I was fortunate enough to purchase a life insurance policy before all my stuff happened, but it was a small policy. Can’t get any more now without a health check blah blah blah. But at least my wife has something if I go before she does. Continue to be positive. What’s the point if being negative? Life is short. Shorter for some even. Why waste time being an a**hole when you could just enjoy it. Be well. Be happy. Be you.

    • Thank you kind sir! I believe bitterness is so not the way to go. Every now and then I do feel negativity coming on. It’s not abnormal to feel a little negative on occasion but I feel it is when people surround themselves with negative thoughts. I just remind myself that I can still enjoy my hobbies and I can still make people smile. You take care of yourself.

      • You can’t enjoy the day unless you experience the night, and you can’t enjoy the sun unless you experience the rain. We have to have some negativity some where, but yes, some propel just stay in the rain more than they should! 😄

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